Goals

[edg]

or, Holy Crap, That's What I Look Like From The Side?

So here's the trouble with goals: I don't know how to set and keep them. I'm not very good with setting internal consequences for not meeting goals. (You may read that as "I don't have very much willpower", if you like.) So I have a problem with getting things done, as long as there are no consequences imposed by external forces.

How is this done? How do you find a good balance between "unmotivating" and "unrealistic"? How do you motivate yourself to do something if the only pressure to do it is yourself?

Comments

[sariel-di.livejournal.com]

I'm also not really good with goal-setting/meeting, but...

- It actually helps me hugely if I don't have other people remind me about it. The reminders tend to piss me off even if they're not intended to, which means that I go from "I'll do it eventually, if slowly" to "I will froth while I do it or I will refuse to do it at all". >_>

(Honestly, with a lot of chores and whatnot, I tend to just class it as "something to do". Completely neutral, maybe vaguely interesting depending on my mood at the time. Which is less incentive to do it by and large, but more incentive than "I hate this but I have to do it" would be.)

- Habits and schedules are great. In high school, my schedule was something like "eat dinner, then start work on homework". Since I'd eat dinner pretty soon after getting home, that'd give me plenty of time to work slowly on homework. Didn't make the homework any more pleasant, but with enough time I could multitask HW and the MU* effectively, and that made me more willing to do it overall.

- Carrot. Carrot carrot carrot. [grins] As long as it's a carrot you can make yourself not take (or at least not take easily) if you don't follow through with the goal. (My default carrot for practically anything was "if I get this done soon, I get lots of time later to slack off and do [thing I'm into] and not worry about it", but different carrots might work better for different things.) Do not stick with just the stick, or else you're going to feel like it's a frustration catch-22. At least part of the stick should be "lack of carrot".

And that's...about all I can think of off the top of my head. [scritchies lots] [wishes luck at goal-meeting...]