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Oct. 1st, 2004
It's been striking me recently that I let myself be influenced far more than I realized before.
Part of this stems from the not-being-good-enough issue I talked about briefly yesterday, in that if I can't be good enough I can at least have acceptable opinions. Another part of it is a nagging feeling that if somebody's made up their mind about something, and calls me on violating their made-up opinion, my immediate reaction is that they must know more than I do on the subject.
I've always had a distaste for a certain vulgar word for the female genitalia (which distaste I mentioned several weeks ago - and![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
undauntra, it's because I don't object to the meaning of the word, but I do object to the attitude which its use bespeaks*), but I didn't have an active dislike of the word until I encountered someone I respected who hated it. I haven't even heard from this person in probably five years.
My unease about the word "intriguing" (and its various conjugations and declensions) stems from a negative association ("it's a word that idiots use when they try to sound intelligent") from someone I haven't spoken to since I went to college seven years ago.
I'm still uncomfortable liking Sting's music because my friends in high school, none of whom I have seen in more than eight years, made fun of it. (By contrast, I have several albums I've only ever listened to once, which I bought because my friends thought they were good albums. Sorry, Mike, but I still hate Nirvana.)
With the caveat that "just stop doing it" isn't a valid answer, how do I lose the fear that generates this response in me? Is this just a facet of strength of character, or is there something specific I can do?
* This is one of those words where the user either intends disrespect, is deliberately being vulgar, or doesn't know any better terms - or possibly more than one of the above.
Part of this stems from the not-being-good-enough issue I talked about briefly yesterday, in that if I can't be good enough I can at least have acceptable opinions. Another part of it is a nagging feeling that if somebody's made up their mind about something, and calls me on violating their made-up opinion, my immediate reaction is that they must know more than I do on the subject.
I've always had a distaste for a certain vulgar word for the female genitalia (which distaste I mentioned several weeks ago - and
undauntra, it's because I don't object to the meaning of the word, but I do object to the attitude which its use bespeaks*), but I didn't have an active dislike of the word until I encountered someone I respected who hated it. I haven't even heard from this person in probably five years.My unease about the word "intriguing" (and its various conjugations and declensions) stems from a negative association ("it's a word that idiots use when they try to sound intelligent") from someone I haven't spoken to since I went to college seven years ago.
I'm still uncomfortable liking Sting's music because my friends in high school, none of whom I have seen in more than eight years, made fun of it. (By contrast, I have several albums I've only ever listened to once, which I bought because my friends thought they were good albums. Sorry, Mike, but I still hate Nirvana.)
With the caveat that "just stop doing it" isn't a valid answer, how do I lose the fear that generates this response in me? Is this just a facet of strength of character, or is there something specific I can do?
* This is one of those words where the user either intends disrespect, is deliberately being vulgar, or doesn't know any better terms - or possibly more than one of the above.
