(no subject)

[edg]

Relient K, "Forward Motion", Two Lefts Don't Make A Right... But Three Do

I've been banging my head against the wall
For so long it seems I knocked it down
Yeah it got knocked down
And the heating bills went through the roof
And the wall I knocked down was the proof
That my landlord needed to kick me out

I got evicted, now I'm living on the street
My spirits lifted - oh, wait, that wasn't me
So many turns I turn out to be wrong
This time I learned that I knew it all along

When car crashes occur
Then I'll be what you were
When I see what I should
When I see that it's good
That it's good

To experience the bittersweet
To taste defeat
Then brush my teeth
To experience the bittersweet
To taste defeat
Then brush my teeth

'Cause I struggle with forward motion
I struggle with forward motion
We all struggle with forward motion
'Cause forward motion is harder than it sounds
Well, every time I gain some ground
I have to turn myself around again
It's harder than it sounds
Well, every time I gain some ground
I have to turn myself around again

I've been banging my head against the wall
For so long it seems I got knocked out
Yeah I got knocked out cold
And the medical bills went through the roof
And the scar on my head is the proof
That I'll still remember this when I get old

I got evicted, now I'm living on the street
My spirits lifted - oh, wait, that wasn't me
So many turns I turn out to be wrong
This time I learned that I knew it all along

When I grasp the concept
Then I'll sleep where you slept
When I know I need help
When I allow myself
Allow myself

To experience the bittersweet
To taste defeat
Then brush my teeth
To experience the bittersweet
To taste defeat
Then brush my teeth

'Cause I struggle with forward motion
I struggle with forward motion
We all struggle with forward motion
'Cause forward motion is harder than it sounds
Well, every time I gain some ground
I have to turn myself around again
It's harder than it sounds
Well, every time I gain some ground
I have to turn myself around again

'Cause I struggle with forward motion
'Cause I struggle with forward motion
We all struggle with forward motion

My therapy session yesterday was remarkably successful, all things considered. Again, it's nice to have someone I don't know to rant at, and I'm surprised at how de-stressed I feel, and at how many different issues I managed to talk out yesterday. In particular, we addressed the concept of easy excuses - specifically, how easy it was to come up with easy reasons not to do something - and reasons why I would use them, including fear of failure (what if, after putting all that effort into it, I'm still not good at it?) and fear of success (because not succeeding is what I'm used to, and it's comfortable).

After the session, I stopped by Music & Arts and bought a few books - an Alfred guitar primer and a book of Joe Satriani songs - as well as a music stand. When I got home, I got my guitar out of its case and tuned it up - I didn't practice much, mainly because Alex wouldn't leave the guitar alone if I had it in my hands - set up the music stand, and got a stool from the kitchen. I think today's project may be setting up the stereo downstairs and figuring out what I need to do in order to patch my guitar through - assuming, of course, that my father hasn't run off with the patch cable. (The amp I was using ... wow, last year ... is his, and I think my cable was attached to it when the movers came and got it.) Also at Music & Arts, I looked into singing lessons - one lesson a week, $86.50 a month. It seems like a lot - $1,000 a year - but I'm sure I can find somewhere from where I can pull $86.50 a month. If nothing else, that's just 3,000 words a month sold to Pyramid.

It also turns out that my old guitar teacher, Joe Weaver - from whom I took lessons about ten years ago - is still teaching there, although all of his slots are full. Oh well. :)

The next step in this process is to start looking at adult-education classes for the spring semester - in particular acting and drawing classes. The Baltimore County Community College offers AE courses, but most of them are geared toward retirees or people trying to go into business, not the arts. Still, I'm sure I can find something. After that, I'm going to see about setting up an appointment for a physical and blood work with a local physician; I'm not sure who around here accepts Carefirst, but I'm sure I can find someone.

EDIT: I have an appointment for a physical examination on Friday at 2 PM. Go me!

Comments

[elissa-carey.livejournal.com]

All of those sound like really good ideas! I wish I had any talent with the guitar or drawing. (Especially drawing. My mother and my daughter are the artists, but I struggle. Would be useful if I ever took any interior design or architecture classes.) Good luck. :)

[edg.livejournal.com]

I never can tell. I'm constantly comparing myself to other people, so I consider myself pretty awful - even if I do have talent, I'd never notice it. :)

Thanks!

[elissa-carey.livejournal.com]

Well, try this comparison on for size: you've more talent than I do. Feel blessed. :)

[telerib.livejournal.com]

Where are you getting voice lessons at that price?! The best I've seen is like $60/hr. Are they private or group, and 30 or 60 min? I must find this Music & Arts place! ...you doing anything Sunday morning?

OK, now that I'm less hyper... sounds like you're in for a lot of fun! If you do take guitar lessons, let me know how they go; I've got my dad's old acoustic upstairs and have been meaning to teach myself... since, oh, 2001 or so. If you find a good teacher with reasonable rates, I'd love to hear about it.

[edg.livejournal.com]

Eek! Each instructor sets his or her own prices. I'm taking half-hour private lessons, so it actually works out to about $40-45 an hour, but they could be expanded to hour-long lessons (at, I imagine, $173 a month) if I wanted to. Music & Arts's website is http://www.musicarts.com/ if you're interested; there's a Laurel (http://www.musicarts.com/html/locations/location_individual.cfm?store=1047) location, which is the closest I can find to you. (aemccurry, there's also one in Germantown; since you haven't told me the name of your store, I don't know if this is the one at which you're already giving lessons. ;)

I'm still not sure whether I'm going to be taking the lessons, but hopefully I'll be able to figure out by the end of the week whether it's a feasible investment. (I'm hoping it is.)

For what it's worth, Joe's rates are $85 a month for guitar lessons; I don't know how that compares to industry standards, though.

[aemccurry.livejournal.com]

"My" store is kind of an affiliate of Music and Arts. That's where they get their rental instruments at least. For what it's worth, our lessons are $20 per half-hour lesson (teacher gets half). And if you can't find the right cale let me know, I can get my hands on something. I've been told that running through a stereo doesn't give nearly as good a sound, but I don't know myself. Good luck!

[cmccurry.livejournal.com]

Note to self: Find decent cheap guitar amp.

[archangelbeth]

I took violin and piano lessons as a kid. I never did learn how to read music, or do violin once they made me take the tapes off that showed where the pure notes were.

Anyone who can actually, like, play stuff and read music. Woah. Ancient mystery to me. All I can do is filk...