edg: (<3)
[personal profile] edg
Spring has rolled around again, and with it the sight of happy couples poking their heads out of their burrows, not being scared off by their shadows, and coming out to enjoy the fresh air and sunshine. Forget Valentine's Day - Spring is the lord of love, and now that the depredations of March have fallen by the wayside, you can see affection blooming all over. Why, the season is enough to make even the most chronically dateless out there wish that they had someone's hand to hold, someone's cheek to caress, someone's ear into which to whisper sweet nothings.

Those who are perennial bachelors, watching and wishing and remaining dateless year after year, might pray for guidance - "how can I, too, get a date?". In the past, even the best options for finding a partner have been scattershot, using unscientific methods to generate poor matches, and these solitary men and women have sunk farther and farther into despair. Is there no hope? Can no one help these brave, lonely, unlucky men and women?

Google™ can help.

Introducing the new Google Romance™. With Google Romance, you can:

  • Upload your profile – tell the world who you are, or, more to the point, who you’d like to think you are, or, even more to the point, who you want others to think you are.

  • Search for love in all (or at least a statistically significant majority of) the right places with Soulmate Search, our eerily effective psychographic matchmaking software.

  • Endure, via our Contextual Dating option, thematically appropriate multimedia advertising throughout the entirety of your free date.

Google Romance™. Because, when you think about it, love is just another search problem.

(Hat tip: [livejournal.com profile] archangelbeth. Some text from http://www.google.com/romance/.)

Date: 2006-04-01 03:57 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] drydem.livejournal.com
the best aspect of this is that you can't fully dismiss it, because Google introduced GMail on 4/1/2004. Everyone took it as a joke, but it wasn't

Date: 2006-04-01 06:52 pm (UTC)
archangelbeth: An anthropomorphic feline face, with feathered wing ears, and glasses, in shades of gray. (Default)
From: [personal profile] archangelbeth
It very nearly seems like it should work, the way they pitch it! O:D

Date: 2006-04-02 12:02 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mnair.livejournal.com

I almost hurt myself trying to stifle the laughter.

Date: 2006-04-02 02:48 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] cmccurry.livejournal.com
I think I'd rather stick with Google Seppuku

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