edg: (Blip!)
It's snowing outside. There's at least an inch and a half of accumulation, and possibly two. I've missed the snow. I know a lot of people hate it, but I actually actively like winter and snowfall.

Sometime in the next few weeks I'm going to have to return to full-time work. I'm not sure that's actually a positive, per se; but it will get me some things that I need, like insurance and the ability to pay my bills. (Unfortunately, this means that I'm going to be spending even less time online than I already am, but I'm not entirely convinced that that's a bad thing.)

Three cups of coffee on a full stomach produces a less pronounced jitteriness than three cups of coffee on an empty stomach. I'm glad I waited until after I ate this morning to have those three cups. (It doesn't help, though, that I suspect that those three cups - from SAGA - were brewed more strongly than usual.)

It's nice to know that I'm not the only one who shows up early for CGI, although in some respects it's also nice to have the room to myself.

This is the one that you might actually want to pay attention to: In the wake of one of my recent posts, I've decided to stop posting creative work to this journal. The stated goal of posting my work to this journal is to get feedback; all of the "it's your journal, do what you want with it" arguments aside, it seems that most of you aren't actually interested in (or don't have the time for, which gives the same end result) my work. The latter is incompatible with the former, and so in the interest of clearing up my journal and not being disappointed by the stated goal not being fulfilled, I'm simply going to stop posting creative work here. This doesn't mean that I'm going to stop creating, and in fact I find it highly likely that I am, instead, going to start putting creative work on a website somewhere and create an RSS feed for newly-posted work.

(I did consider using [livejournal.com profile] etherjammer as a way to get work on the web, but in the end, it suffers from the same flaw that this journal does: my posts there don't get comments. Likewise with Aleae Iaciens, although I'm a little less sensitive about that venue for some reason. The object of putting work on my website is to mitigate the frustration I feel at not receiving comments, since I probably won't be providing a way to leave them - and if I do, it'll be an email address or something.)

N+1

Jan. 17th, 2006 06:51 pm
edg: (Silly)
I encourage you all to read today's Irregular Webcomic!, if you haven't already.

Not only is the ur-lightbulb joke probably the funniest thing I've seen all week (YES I AM A GEEK WHY DO YOU ASK), but David Morgan-Mar is, I think, the undisputed grand-master of the beat panel, and this is an excellent example of his supremacy.
edg: (Broken)
My social interaction parser is broken, perhaps fatally so. I know that there are non-standard social interaction patterns out there - and by "non-standard" I mean "anything other than generic friendly behavior"; the problem is that I don't see half of them, and when I do notice one, I throw an error, stop interacting, and don't start interacting again until the error is resolved, either because I've figured out what went wrong or because the pattern stopped.

For perceived negative non-standard interactions, I assume a write error: I have done something wrong. I won't start interacting again until either the pattern stops or I've figured out what I've done wrong.

For perceived positive non-standard interactions, I assume a read error: I am misinterpreting this. I won't start interacting again until either the pattern stops or I've figured out what the pattern really is.

In neither circumstance am I necessarily right.

There are two major consequences of this. The first is that I tend to stay away from social situations unless I am explicitly invited into them (this extends, in extreme circumstances, to leaving groups that have formed around me), and to leave a situation I've entered if I happen to notice a perceived negative non-standard interaction - and remember, "standard" for me is "generic friendly", so even basic neutrality often comes across as negative!

The second consequence is that I very often simply don't notice or understand what you might consider basic social cues, which means that, quite frankly, you can't rely on them to convey information. If you want me to know something, you must tell me, or you run the risk of not getting your message across.

I'm sorry about this. I really, really wish I were different. I really wish I could figure out how to be different, but I can't.
edg: (A-ha!)
It's really weird to have a breakthrough in a dream. Not just "I let my mind mull it over, and knew the answer when I woke up"; I specifically remember the part of the dream during which I had the breakthrough, and why I had the breakthrough, and - most importantly - what the breakthrough was.

See, I've had a project in my head since Christmas. Alex loves playing old Nintendo games - Mega Man in particular is right up his alley - but he has a lot of trouble figuring out the keyboard controls for an emulator. So I've been thinking about reworking an original Nintendo controller so that it was essentially a self-contained emulator, but I've been having problems with the logistics. In particular, how do you get the system to just go to the emulator?

The dream involved a government search of a private school to determine which teacher had helped a student steal a professional music video for a school project, and featured scenes like Penn Jillette (playing the part of a government agent) interviewing Susan Wise (one of the classics professors at Earlham), and Wallace Shawn (playing a teacher), Mary Lacey (an English professor), and Bob Southard (a history professor) building a concealed microphone out of an alarm clock and an electric typewriter so that they could listen in on Shawn's conversation with the Feds, and it was during this last scene that the answer hit me. (I'm still not sure why.)

See, I've been thinking of this project as requiring Windows - but it doesn't. The emulator I prefer is actually a DOS program! Which almost certainly means that I can just put a rudimentary DOS, the emulator, and all of the ROMs on a "thumb drive" - one of the keychain-style flash-memory drives - and set AUTOEXEC.BAT to just load the emulator when the system starts up.

Now I just have to figure out the hardware aspect. It might be easier to work with a NES Advantage, thinking about it, than a standard controller; I don't know how much room the control board takes up, but it can't take up that much more room in an Advantage, which is several times the size...

(Before you comment: there are almost certainly existing controller-to-game-player ports out there. I'm not really that interested in hearing about them; I'd like to figure this out myself.)
edg: (Writing III)
So here's the thing: I'm wondering if it's worthwhile to put creative work on this journal.

The obvious goal of putting my work on this journal is to get feedback, and by and large, that doesn't happen. I get one or two people commenting at most, and usually it's not even that. (I do appreciate the comments I get, though!) The people who read this journal don't seem particularly interested in my ability to be creative; or if they are, they don't seem particularly interested in letting me know that they are.

It's important, too, that I'm not looking exclusively for praise here. I generally don't have a very high opinion of my own work, and I don't expect anyone else too either. When I post something I've created here, I don't expect anyone to blow sunshine up my ass; in fact, I'd almost rather have negative comments than squeeing. I would say that what I'm really looking for is evidence that you're interested, but I'd really even rather get "this is boring" than silence.

But what I'm getting is silence, for the most part. When I put my creative work on this journal, it doesn't fulfill the stated goal of getting feedback, and, as far as I can tell, it's not even being entertaining for most of you. The end result is that I'm left wondering whether I should keep doing it.

I don't know the answer, but I am feeling pretty discouraged.

Batgirl

Jan. 13th, 2006 10:48 pm
edg: (Bad math)
So there's a meme going around Livejournal today: draw Batgirl, post the drawing. (Thanks to several of you for pointing it out.)

I had no intention of participating.

But it did get me thinking that I should start drawing again, because by God I really would like to be a semi-functional artist someday. So this evening, while I was waiting for dinner to cool, I pulled out my sketchbook, a 2B pencil, and my trusty Mars plastic eraser, pulled up a stock photo, and started sketching.

And this came out. I have no idea where it came from. I swear to God I do not usually possess even this level of skill. When I complain about how bad an artist I am, this level of artistry is not what I'm complaining about! If I could figure out a way to channel this, I would be happy with my skill level. (Not satisfied - never satisfied - but at least not disgruntled!)

Okay, that disclaimer out of the way:

Batgirl. Well, partial Batgirl. )
edg: (Think before you act)
Hat tip: [livejournal.com profile] followyourfish.

Remember, kids, use Paste responsibly. (Make sure you read the entire clipping to get the full effect.)
edg: (You are here)
...to start a semester not feeling like I'm unwelcome and being an imposition everywhere I go.
edg: (Blip!)
  • Today was enrollment confirmation at Earlham. (Discovered about half an hour before enrollment confirmation ended. Fastest shower I've ever taken.)
  • My old roommate Dave will apparently be in town tomorrow afternoon.
  • Video games are fun, but they're not work.
  • I can spend a full hour tracking down a piece of trivia about a web browser if I'm in the right mood.
  • Although my major declaration was complete, and although it was approved by the registrar, it never actually went through.
  • Apparently [livejournal.com profile] phosphodae is a junior. Who knew? (For some reason I'd gotten it into my head that you were a sophomore!)
  • Laundry is not very much fun to do in the rain; nor is it very effective when you have to carry the clean laundry across about 200 feet of open space. (This is why I will be doing laundry tomorrow morning.)
  • A Band-Aid on my nose is not as distracting as I thought it would be.
edg: (Silly)
In the dark future of Hollywood parodies, there is only Shatner.

Warning: video file.
edg: (Silly)
From World of Warcraft:

edg: (I'm With Stupid)
Submitted without further comment.
edg: (They call me the working man)
Or, y'know, at least Kalypso.

I'm back, finally, in Richmond, this time to stay for a while (instead of for six hours like I did last time). Alex is with his mother.

I now know how to get to Detroit Metro Airport from just about anywhere, where Bowling Green, OH is ($A_CERTAIN_PERSON, if I hadn't thought I'd wake someone up, I'd have called), and exactly how irrationally bitchy people get when their plane is delayed (hint: they have to connect the jetway and open the door before you can get off the plane; "we've already been delayed an hour and a half and now they want us to wait a few more minutes?" is a direct quotation, and was said in all seriousness. As was "we should sue them for compensation for our time").

Now, sleep. I hope.
edg: (Me)
Resolved:

  • That I will avoid personal melodrama wherever I can;
  • That I will remember that it is all right for me to be happy;
  • That I will be dedicated in school and work;
  • That I will not make assumptions about how people feel about me;
  • That I will make better use of my time;
  • That I will not let my past unduly affect my ability to consider the future.
edg: (Blip!)
in richmond

dilemma: unload or sleep?

dilemma solved; couldn't sleep, so unloaded.
edg: (In Motion)
Home (well, in Maryland) at last. As of 2:45 AM. So you can stop worrying now.

(Also? Hate dial-up. Hate hate.)

Thought foremost on my mind: does Cells, Genes, and Inheritance still use the same textbook that it did five years ago? Because I already have one of those.

Thought secondforemost: god damn but it's cold in here.

Confession

Dec. 28th, 2005 12:25 am
edg: (Me)
I had a brief talk - maybe 10 minutes - with my father tonight. I'm leaving for Indiana, and thence Maryland, tomorrow, and he wanted to know if there was anything I needed to talk about. I said something like "Oh, everything's okay, I just wish I weren't so full of self-doubt", which launched a conversation whose central thesis was pretty much "you need to get rid of that self-doubt".

None of the following text has been edited from the way in which it originally appeared in this journal. It has just been cut away for various reasons.

Read more... )

In my life, I have been a spendthrift, a liar, a thief, and a cheat; I have hurt people and neglected my responsibilities as a person and a member of society. I am truly sorry.
edg: (<3)
And so I offer you this simple phrase
For kids from 1 to 92
Although it's been said many times, many ways --

Merry Christmas to you
edg: (Santa Bunnies)
(Anyone have a spare Clarence? I could use a dose of perspective.)
edg: (Disappointed)
I get strange images in my head when I'm reading well-written fiction and waiting for laundry to dry.

I part my left hand's fingers and look through cautiously. Regan has transferred her murderous gaze to me, and Katherine has paused mid-stroke, the match and the box still clutched in her fingers. I can see the ropes around Regan's waist and the gag around her mouth -- and, barely, the paper stuck haphazardly into her socks, over her slacks.

My girlfriend's eyes narrow to slits, and I just shake my head, pick up the satchel that fell from my left hand, and take a drag off the cigarette in my right. "Well, at least she's got the theory down..."


I would really like to see this scene drawn, but I don't have the skill for it...

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